Notes on Styling | 67 | Looks, Links & Learnings.
Lessons from a style coaching journey & one ladies look book.
Hello my Lovelies,
One thing style coaching has taught me (versus say, a faster-paced personal shopping appointment) is in reality, how long it takes for us to make meaningful internal changes and really believe;
a) We can have a look that feels true to us.
b) We deserve it enough to believe in it once the coaching stops.
c) It’s ok to buy with this new picture in our heads and not revert to old buying habits.
One thing I’ve been working on and playing with this season is what happens when I go back to create another lookbook for clients a season after our work together has finished.
It has been as much for me as for them. I wanted to see the impact after having more time for reflection, if confidence has shifted, what’s been on their mind, and what they most commonly found hard about making change. I also wanted to know what they might be seeing differently for this second round of looks.
…And, it turns out, there was lots.
After we dig into this a little more over a lovely conversation, I have been sending a new Look Book their way, which has been acting kind of like a second lovely bridge to walk across, into the land of another new season for their new style pattern and direction.
Today, I have a special treat for you my lovely readers, a look inside one such look book along with some little notes on those conversations, which clients have kindly allowed me to share. I found it fascinating, I hope you do too!
Much of our conversations really moved me and really showed us both just how true style change is a journey and one that can’t be rushed. It also proved to me just how different everyone is, mainly depending on where they started from, how much they are actually into fashion and other variables.
You can download the Look Book as a PDF below and click on any of the items, which will bring you directly to each item’s website. Have a little browse with a cuppa and enjoy. But remember, this is someone else’s style story with all of her at its core!
Before you dive in, have a little scroll below to some notes from our lovely conversations…
Shopping in a new way for yourself can mean having a VERY LITTLE black book to start & that’s ok, good in fact.
I began coaching thinking the more brands I introduce clients too the better but as it turns out making more solid confidence shifts comes from having less brands to shop from for a time that really help the picture you are building sink in and give you solid places to browse for yourself as you begin shopping in a new way.
Over time this grows
Going back for a second time to clients, I did see and feel a different reaction. For the first, it can be overwhelming - all these clothes - what to buy. I get that. I try to impress the point that it’s not about buying everything but seeing a bigger picture build and come together too but of course it’s hard not to see and want everything! But on the second look-book, there was more excitement about what was coming, more confidence to know they can pick the bits and pieces that will make the season better for them and not get overwhelmed by everything. The second look-book they are ready for more brands!
Confidence has built in seeing the value of outfits versus clothes
A big revelation for me was listening to clients get excited about accessories this time. It was like season one was all about the clothes, the focus was on this big shift of the clothes they look for, look at and buy - but now, they could see the value in all the little things that really lean a look towards one overall feeling or another. They were ready for ALL the lovely bits in a look, not just the clothes.
We can only take so much change at one time
I might be focused on helping them see an overall picture, one that’s made up of certain colour direction to build wardrobe harmony, key shapes and styling ideas but mostly the client looking cannot see all of that at once. What they see first are the clothes that scare them, that they would never pick themselves. Then once they buy one or two of these wild card items and see why I picked them and why they work (and they have had a season to digest and experience the confidence they bring) - now, more of the whole picture can be seen.
Making changes for yourself is never in isolation of others opinions
I’ve learnt just how much making a change for yourself (and taking that big step yourself) will still be influenced by the people around you. There will always be a person or group of people who we fear judgement from. Mostly it can be work related - not wanting to ‘wear all my lovely new clothes’ into work but I also learnt this is about you just taking your own time with leaning into these changes for yourself and easing into it. What people think had changed by our second season conversation once you begin to believe in this new direction and feel it’s benefits.
Not everyone loves to shop
Even after they have been on a style journey. Sometimes it’s just about finding a way of updating your wardrobe that does not involve going shopping that much at all but that does mean you can still have a style and clothes you love. And that’s ok! I would say the one thing I saw differently on our second look-book was the feeling of creativity they felt when getting dressed in these clothes. When you are not into fashion (or similar) you discount yourself as not a creative person but I have seen that with the right things, that feel good to you, each time you get dressed you are taking control of your own personal world of creativity and you realise that you can indeed be creative for your own personal pleasure!
Confidence builds creativity
Even though each look sits on it’s own in a Look Book, it does have a cohesive colour direction and style story, everything can be mixed and matched. But the first look book isn’t about going hard on this I realise. It’s visually there to see but sometimes, just following exactly what the look does on the page is enough. On our second look book conversations, the number of women who naturally played with this themselves really surprised me. They might have taken a matching set and broken it up and put the bottoms with a different top and shoes. I think I learnt here just the power of letting people see some things themselves when they are on their own and without me. Just seeing their own natural instincts grow in confidence was really moving.
I feel I could keep going but I’ll stop there. I hope you enjoyed and reach out anytime with thoughts or questions and as always I am in the comments below.
Speak soon and hope you enjoy a little Look Book browse.
Julie x