5. The Denim Experiment

All the things I've learnt about finding the perfect pair, from my own personal journey as well as from styling my lovely clients.

Lately, I have been stuck on a particular clothing item. Jeans. It’s funny how over the years there are items of clothing that become our personal holy grail. Something we really want to master. Denim for me just sings along so easily with my personal style, yet finding that perfect, perfect, perfect fit always feels kind of out of reach. Or at the very least I am always on the lookout for better. When maybe it’s the brands that need to do better?

No matter what the ‘item’ is that you would love to master, it is our good old internal voice that’s well and truly switched on to telling us our body isn’t right for the jeans, not the brands need to do better for our bodies.

Jeans for me just are the perfect wardrobe staple. My Style Design is undone, elevated and natural and jeans just fit this for me, allowing me to play with my style and in creating outfits, achieve a feeling of laid-back luxe. Yet thoughts about my body have held me back over the years. If you have a pear shape like me, you will recognise the challenge that the hips and bum is where we feel everything we put on. This is the point on our bodies that we think about when browsing a rail and build up our hopes. This is especially true if like me, as a pear, you are dealing with a different size on the bottom to your top half. I’m a 10 on top and a 12 on the bottom.

But as a personal stylist & coach I have learnt over the years that there is so much magical stuff between where we visualise we want our style and our wardrobe to be but we feel our bodies, our weight, our tummy, our bum, our whatever it is for you, is holding you back; our own thoughts hold us back from exploring styles and ideas because that voice says - there’s no point. It’s hard to change a mindset that’s been set after all. To start to piece together new ways to style those jeans and new shapes that just might work.

In between the lines of my own journey & styling jeans with clients is the mix of the thoughts I share today.

I recently had a little online buy and a try on of a couple of denim styles I had my eye on from the sales and I also had a try on and clear out of what I have denim wise and here is what I learnt.

(I really recommend using the sales as a time to experiment with an item that plays on your mind or a brand you want to explore as long as you are disciplined about sending back. I treat buying online exactly the same as going into a store fitting room only I am in the comfort of my own bedroom, have more time to play and consider.)

What have I learnt about find a great pair of denim and what are the things I really want you too know?

A couple of things first.

What is it about jeans that makes them so appealing and yet tricky?

- they are the ultimate in relaxed, sophisticated style.

- they provide the perfect base item to so many style directions, dressed up or down.

- right now they tap into this ‘quiet luxury’ idea that being understated is the ultimate in sophisticated, mindful fashion chic.

On the tricky side, they have a bulkier and heavier fabric than anything else so if you are more conscious of your bottom half to your top, they will feel rigid and exposing and it can be so hard to feel at home in them unless you have a pair that feel made for your particular curves.

LESSON 1

FIT IS EVERYTHING

You can pay £300 for a super duper trendy brand but if the fit doesn’t feel right and or the fabric is stiff and bulky, you won’t wear them. You can have success on the high street just as much as with expensive brands if you really lean into what your body feels good in.

As a curvy pear, I generally look for these things first and foremost 1) a high waist (up to belly button) 2) a more ‘barrel’ or rounded shape or cut wider around the hips for a little more ease around my hips 3) a slightly looser leg around my calf but not too wide or it adds too much and tips the balance to make me feel bottom heavy.

Let’s Challenge those beliefs.

Identify your tick list by being honest and kind to yourself about your shape. What do you need in order to feel good? Not what you needed 15 years ago, what do you need now?

If you had a higher waistband (higher than you have been buying perhaps) would that be likely to actually make you comfier in the tummy and provide a better foundation for styling in different ways? Think logically about the impact of trying something slightly different.

If you moved away from skinny and tried a little more fabric around the calves, challenge the idea that more fabric = you will look bigger. Would it actually give you an ease and perhaps help you to embrace your shape, give you a more wearable option for everyday?

A good fit should feel easy to move in - it should not feel Saturday night tight. One of the biggest mindset shifts in playing with denim is how we can get stuck with a certain style, believing that is the only style that suits me and this is purely based on the fact you have worn it for 15 years. Remember, how we were all repulsed by skinny jeans when they first came out? I have gotten a couple of clients out of the skinnies and into a more straight leg or a shape that is higher in the waist and/or has more room to move around the hips and the biggest shift is psychological - truly.

Women believe to feel skinny and look skinny they must need to wear skinny. Now, I get the idea and where it comes from but this is the thing with trying out something new, how you see things has to adjust just as much as the outfit itself. How you would style a slightly more relaxed pair of denim IS different to skinny. So more than the jeans perhaps will need to shift and this too is hard.

So to recap, be open-minded and focus on looking at the key points that matter to your body type. How do you want to look and feel in those jeans at this time? and look at Jean’s with this open-minded, fresh lens.

Generally from my experience, a higher waist works better on 90% of women. Just on or above the belly button. This gives support and shape around the tummy and therefore will feel easier to style and play with. I always look for either mid-rise or high-rise for most clients.

These were my first more away from 'skinny skinny' ;-) and I still do love them. They are from Marks & Spencers - the Harper Cigarette Jeans. I'm wearing a 10 Regular and I have them 2 years now and still love them. They are Cotton with 1% Elastane which works great for curves as it gives a little more stretch.

I think Marks are great for denim and are always a go-to for me with clients. They still have the Harper here.

If I do wear skinny now, I will always look for a super high waist to feel supported in the tummy and to create a good foundation but really my style is moving more towards more movement and ease.

This light tone was a new try for me a year or two ago. Lighter draws the eye more but I love the chilled feeling of the colour. These are from Zara and have a slightly straighter leg, which helps to ease you into this direction if you want to give it a go!

Mine are quite old but here is a pair that looks quite similar.

These are a much more expensive brand (Agolde), which I've wanted to try and you can see how the amount of width in the leg tips my proportions off and makes me look bottom heavy. Too much fabric. This is why trying is key. Feeling what they feel like on your body is key and understanding your own proportions. These went right back to the store.

They are the Agolde Low Rise Baggy in Light Blue. Though I did like my curves in them!

Here is the same pair in Black but with a slightly shorter leg so that little less length helps with the proportions and what feels good but still feels too much for me when I tried them on. They also went back.

LESSON 2

LETTING YOUR STYLE GUIDE YOU

This is something I am so passionate about - understanding how YOU describe your own personal style. Your 3 words. Those 3 words help you build an outfit, match with brands and know how an item will add to your wardrobe. Knowing my own 3 style words and focusing on them is key for Jeans shopping too. Mine are Undone, Elevated and Natural. In brief today :-), a great outfit for me will feel not overly perfect yet it feels sophisticated at the same time and very girl next door, natural.

(The natural part of my style has more to do with loving neutral colours mostly, hating the feeling of too much makeup and embracing my natural hair colour!)

My Style words help me to visualise and ask myself, when I try on this pair of jeans, what I will I do with them to create outfits that feel like me?

It is the single biggest thing that matters for making the final decision on whether these particular jeans will be a good buy for MY wardrobe.

This is a pair of Jeans I own from H&M but don't wear. I know it is because for me they are not 'undone' enough. They feel too restrictive and fitted when I wear so my first style word box is not ticked enough to bring these from good to great. I can't even open my eyes in the photo to look lol. I get they fit me and look fine but as with all items, it's how they FEEL to you when you put them on that matters.

However, these low slung baggy pair from Agolde DO tick all my boxes (though I will need to shorten!). Just enough space to feel 'undone' and relaxed, yet the colour feels elevated and I can picture lots of ways I will style them that feels natural and everyday. I am wearing in a 27" waist and I did keep. Shortening them will also reduce that fabric overload and I am into the relaxed ease of an ankle length over a full length.

Agolde Low Rise Baggy in Milkshake (not that low rise really).

LESSON 3

WHEN IN DOUBT STYLE IT OUT

This is why trying on at home is so key. If the fit feels good, the fabric just what you are after and the colour a dream - how many ways can you wear them with what you own? This is the ultimate personal styling test - to see if they fit with how you like to wear your clothes. To see if they fit with your 3 words. Especially with shoes as this can be the trickiest part.

Agolde Jeans, Zara Shirt, Leather heels bought in Spain.

Same outfit but with Bobbies Leather Loafers

Here is a similar loafer from Bobbies. These were such a good buy for my wardrobe. They literally go with everything and still give that high-low mix of undone and elevated.

LESSON 4

GOING ON A FEELING

I have learnt that Jeans really are one of those items that your gut will tell you whether you feel like yourself in & truly comfortable in. Settling, because they are 70% right rarely works. But yes, finding 100% takes real self-awareness and work!

These might just be my favourite pair. How do I know? Because wearing them takes no thinking! They fit so well, give me room to move and live! Feel undone yet I can dress them up in a way that feels good to me. I can tuck up the hem for relaxed days but can wear them full length with a smart boot. Where are they from? They are the Uniqlo 'U' Curve Jean in Light Blue.

Their Boyfriend Jeans at the minute are quite similar but I think Uniqlo is worth keeping an eye on, they have lovely soft great quality cotton fabrics and are always bringing out new styles but unlike Zara, not quite so overwhelming in their choice and the quality is definitely better. The cottons they use softer.

Another favourite in my wardrobe this Summer are from Topshop (stocked now on ASOS). The Awkard Barrel Leg Jean in Pebble as below.

The Topshop Awkard Barrel Leg Jeans in Pebble tick all my boxes - super high-waisted to draw the eye up and make my legs feel longer :-), a little more room around the hips for ease and a relaxed leg.

If you’ve reached the bottom, hope you have enjoyed this post! Feel free to leave any comments or questions below or you can always reach out hi@juliecobbe.ie.

My key takeaway if to simply re-think what might feel good to you and why - now. Start with looking at your body and perhaps what styles of trousers generally feel good and let your denim experiment follow the same path. Be open-minded, kind to yourself and remember that paying more does not always = better for your style and wardrobe.

Speak soon & hope you are all enjoying the summer!

Julie x